it's already been a month.

"can you hear my heart crying out for you?"
i just realized that today has been a month.

my weekend was pretty chill tho. i kinda felt like things were getting back to normal. not neccessarily ? but, it just felt like it was getting better. i was happy. but yeah, scratch that out. cause of today.

anyways ! i'll get back to that subject later. sooooo, saturday ! went to stockton for my cousin lindseys 16th birthday party. there house is sooo nice ! it was my first time visiting. it was nice, kicked it with the cousins. i spent the night too. hella unplanned tho, lol. we went out at like 12am to go to safeway to buy stuff. jasmine had to get her chips :) lol ! we wanted to watch twilight at the house but the dvd player didn't work, sucks ! didn't sleep till like 4am. parents + other cousins went to the casino & came back like at 5am? charlene was stuck with the kids, lol ! the next morning, went out to target, sheerwood mall & ate at chilis. i haven't been there in a long time ! soooo gooood . [: i had leftovers tho, lol. & the desert was yummy ! then went home around like 4. pictures & videos are coming soon !

today is just another ordinary day. it's been arrrrite tho, still got an hour & 15 minutes left tho :/ anyways, you still question me. thoughts about you still run through my mind. idk why you act the way you do, or think the way you do. your my biggest concern,, my biggest wonder, my biggest question. but, i still can never figure you out. things aren't the same. & just because we're not like that anymore, doesn't mean you can treat me any different. i'm still here, aren't i? sometimes, i feel like you aren't. sometimes i think, "where you at?" no where to be seen, or found. you'd be next to me, so close but yet many miles away from me. sooo many miles away that i'm so far from where i want to be. my heart, everyday, cries out for you. but can you hear? no, probably not.


BTW ! Happy Birthday Angelica !
I love you Jelllaaaay. [: <3

"i'm lookin out of the crowd, i don't know where you are.
it's like i'm hearing you know, but you feel so far.
i don't know what i can do, been searching everywhere.
that's why i lay here at night & dream you to life."


today's horoscope:
"Dreaminess, nostalgia -- you're plagued by all of it. What a great opportunity to reach back in your past and rekindle a past but platonic relationship. An old friend you weren't attracted to suddenly makes your belly flutter. What's this all about? Pursue it further."

edit [5:13pm]

photobucket update:









for all pictures from saturday & sunday, click here.


new photos from 1st period !



this guy says,
"you don't have to shed tears to cry."

max !


marc took my camera so he can take a picture of our assignment.




youtube update: webcam on aim w/ patrick. xP check those 2 out ?

you really need to break this silence. cause, i'm trying to show you that i'm arrite, when really i'm not. but, i'm tryna establish a friendship. like you said, but all this silence is making it worse. it's not making anything better. it makes things worse than how they already are. outside of school, we talk as if everything's good. you act hella cool tho but at school, treat me as if i'm not an existence to you. & that hurts me. because, i'm trying to make the situation better by being comfortable around you. & what do you do? now your the one acting quiet around me. that doesn't help anything ! then, you tell me you miss me. the minute i leave you at school. you just saw me tho, it makes no sense. you question me. & you leave me clueless.